Where do your prejudices lie?

I watched Paper Clips, a documentary about a small Tennessee town whose Middle School was trying to teach it's children about diversity and acceptance.  They came up with the idea to teach them about the Holocaust. During a discussion about the 6 million Jews that died a girl asked what 6 million was; that she had never "seen" 6 million.  They decided to search for something that they could collect to represent this number.

Enter the paperclip. They discovered it was invented by a Norwegian and that people in Norway wore paperclips, during the war, to represent people they knew who had been killed or taken to the concentration camps .  This was there way of silently remembering and speaking out so as to not be taken away themselves.



The kids started writing letters, one thing led to another and they ended up collecting over 27 million paperclips.  Most would come one or two at a time with a letter telling the kids about the person the paperclip represented. They had visitors who were survivors and ended up getting a rail car that was used to transport Jews.  It was brought to the school and set up as a memorial that 6 million paper clips were housed in.  They are now sharing this lesson with other schools who come there on field trips.

One of the things that was mentioned in the documentary was how quick we are to judge people.  We may think we are not prejudiced because we are fine with Jews, with African-Americans, with Latinos or Asians etc. etc. etc.  But how often do we stereotype people.

Here are some common ones that I have heard:

Southern drawl = stupid red neck.
Overweight person = lazy slob.
Disheveled and unkempt clothes and hair in a Wal-mart = white trash.
Mormons = those crazy people with 6 wives who wear long black coats and have horns.

People think these things but they are all wrong.  I personally don't have 6 wives or horns. I shave mine down for ease of hairstyle.  (bazinga!)

It made me really stop and think about how quick we can be to put labels on people and what a travesty this is.  The thought doesn't really hurt the person, (if there is no action on the thought) I think the person it hurts is the one doing the labeling.  Why cloud your head with negative thoughts about others.  What is the point?

Judge not lest ye be judged ( I read that this is the most mis-quoted scripture and is actually Judge not, that ye be not Judged - Matthew 7:1)

It really gave me something to think about and put into practice.  To have more compassion, pity, and love for others who are different.  It also makes me wonder what labels have been put on me.

Where do your prejudices lie?

Who says the grass is greener?

In my job, managing a department, I have the occasion to learn things about people's personal lives. Having done payroll and working in the accounting department also affords me those opportunities. Oft times more than I really wanted to know.

Sometimes you look at people and think "they have it all together" or "I wish I had such-and-such like they do". Mostly, it makes me look and my life and think it isn't so bad.

Today is one of those days.  I have my own personal struggles, insecurities, failings; what have you, but all in all, my life isn't so bad.

I have a husband who supports me (most of the time) in things I want to do, my kids are mostly obedient and smart (although I wish one would clean a little more and one would go get a job), I have a good job and I like my job, we can pay our bills, I like my family and his family and we are healthy.

Not everyone can say that.

Theny I hear about this earthquake in Haiti.  Our company adopted an orphanage in Haiti.  The CEO of our company has two babies there that they are in the process of adopting.  It is hard to get word from Haiti.  They are very impoverished and don't have the kind of infrastructure to withstand such violent earthquakes.

Tonight I know my babies (teenagers as they are) are safe and sound.

I hope we can all take a moment to be grateful for the grass we stand on, weeds and all and say a little prayer for our brothers and sisters a world away.

Resolutions Schmesolutions!

So the new year has come and we are officially in the "10's".  I can't believe how time flies the older you get.

I have just enjoyed a week and a half of vacation time and it all ends tomorrow morning when the alarm goes off.  I spent a lot of time in my jammies.  What could be better!

The last three days I have helped my daughter paint her room.  We learned a new technique: "ragging".  We bought a rag roller (Ralph Lauren; don't be impressed.  The only person who sells one).  It is basically a lint free cloth scrunched up and attached to a roller.  You could make one yourself using rubber bands but I figured $9 is worth the trouble. I rolled the glaze onto a small section then she followed after with a sponge to soften the application.  We kind of used two techniques together to create her unique look.

I am not much of a New Year Resolutions gal.  I am more of a think it over in my head then do it kind of gal. I figure if I need to do something why wait until January 1st.  If I haven't gotten to it by January 1st, I don't want to make a production out of deciding what to do.

I have been working on trying to get a little more balance in my life.  I have a tendency to go whole hog into whatever I am doing.  My husband uses the word obsessive;  I prefer to think of it as dedicated.  Anyway I have been trying to leave work at 5 instead of staying until 6 or 7.  Stuff will still be there tomorrow.

I am going to keep on with that through out the new year.  In part of my balance I want to try and attend to some more spiritual parts of my life.  I want to focus on my tithes and offerings, serving others, and reading my scriptures. It is very easy to get carried away in work and fun things (like crafting and reading and scrapbooks) and let the spiritual things fall by the wayside.

I want to take more time for myself and spend more time with my family and friends. I also want to work on the creative outlets in my life.  Scrapbooking, making (and sending) cards, and blogging.

What "think it out in your head and do it" kinds of things will you be working on this year?

Slow down world!

I was wasting time on Facebook and clicked a link. I waited for about two seconds and thought "hm, I wonder if it didn't really click". I was on my way to click again and then saw the little hourglass and it struck me what an impatient society we have turned in to.

I remember growing up when we would call someone on the phone. We didn't have answering machines. If they were home, they would pick up; if they were on the phone, we would hear a busy signal; if they weren't home, we would call back.

I don't think my kids even know what a busy signal is.

Things that we have now are completely amazing and we get irritated that they "take so long"! The microwave - what, it takes 5 minutes? Computer - ugh, this page is taking so long to load. Cell phone - someone didn't text me back for 10 whole minutes! I actually get frustrated when I call someone and they don't have voice mail. You mean I have to call them back?

The old saying "The hurrier I go the behinder I get" rings more and more true. Doesn't it feel like that some times? We rush and hurry, fit more into our days, do more at work with computers but work longer hours and spend less time at home with our families. We order take out because it is faster and wonder why our waistlines grow and our wallets shrink.

When did the world start spinning faster?

New Beginnings

So my 72 year old Dad is getting married.

I am really happy for him. He is marrying a woman that our family has known for years. She lived in our neighborhood growing up. She and her husband were my parents best friends for a long time. They would go camping and do other things together.

Once the decision was made, they decided to get married quickly. Next month. I guess when you are in your 70's and have known each other for over 20 years, why wait? I told my dad he moves pretty quick for an old guy!

Although I am really happy for my Dad, I had to do some fresh crying over my mom. The two things aren't really related, it just made me think about the reason that my dad is able to get married again. She has been gone for 5 years now. I can't believe it has been that long.

I'm happy they will be together and will be able to keep each other from being lonely.

Here's to new beginnings. Cheers Dad!

Help Me I'm Melting!

You know, I used to be cool. Kinda hip anyway. With the times. My clothes were in style and I listened to the current music that was popular. It wasn't until my daughter turned about 13 that I started noticing the dreaded "generation gap" rearing it's ugly head.

Now a couple of years later, things start popping up that make me actually feel a little bit, dare I say, old-ish.

We like to listen to some of the same music. I like, for instance, Evanescence and Linkin Park. And we have raised our kids to appreciate all kinds of music; classical, jazz, the essentials like Sinatra, Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald etc. Much to my chagrin she has recently taken up Country music. I don't know where I went wrong. But sometimes when she has music on (and I use that term loosely) I think to myself "what is up with all that noise and screaming".

I remember when I was a teenager and I had the radio on (as usual) and my dad came by and said "this sounds like jungle music". Well obviously he just didn't get it. So now I think to myself, am I not "getting" it or has music really just gotten as crappy as it sounds. I think the later is true.

I remember the good original rap. Remember Run D.M.C? The music was actually fun. The version of "Walk this Way" with Aerosmith. Classic! Rap today, ugh. And the whole Hip-Hop thing. I would rather listen to my daughter's Country music than Hip-Hop.

I have transitioned to the lower waist band trend so I don't have the dreaded "mom" jeans. I still prefer my Birkenstocks and I hate the pointy high heeled shoes that are popular now. My wide-ish feet don't like them and my lower back doesn't want to be tweaked out of alignment. (am I sounding old-ish?)

I just don't know why the times keep changing and yet so much is the same. I remember in grade school when my mom wore a paisley skirt suit set. I thought it was the most unattractive pattern imaginable. Dare I say hideous. Wouldn't I have been surprised to learn that in my high school years I would love "fish in ecstasy" as we called it. Paisley and argyle. Thin ties and big shoulder pads. Skinny jeans and big sweaters.

It is kind of funny to see the big hair and skinny pants starting to wend it's way back into the social conscience though.

Maybe when it does I will be cool again.

Tags: generation gap, fashion trends, music, Domestic Goddess, blog

To whom it may concern,

I just wanted to take a minute and thank you for the dozens of daily emails that you have been sending me, letting me know about all the many wonderful products and services that have been woefully missing from my life.

As a woman I was completely unaware that Viagra was for me and that it would make such a difference in my life. The fact that I can now get it at such a fabulous price, along with Xanax and Vallium, is wonderful. Although, I think you need to use your spell checker because you have a little problem with your spelling.

I can't wait to try out the latest hot stock tip that you have pointed me toward. Especially that I will now be making $400-$500 per week with your tips on increasing sales from my home business and will have all that extra money to invest. I guess my next step is to find a good home business to apply these new marketing tips to.

I will not be using your medications to increase my size by 100-400% as I am actually trying to lose weight, thus getting smaller. I will be more interested in your new end-all-beat-all weight loss ideas and medications. I am a little confused though, as to why you want to offer me both.

I also wanted to let you know that it is such a good idea how you put "must read" or "very important message, you need to read" in the subject line. That really gets my attention and lets me know to pay said attention to your emails. Otherwise, I might miss them.

As far as finding girls, girls, girls, I already have two teenage daughters and I don't think I really need any more females in my home right now. That is so sweet of you to think about me as an adoptive parent though.

In closing, I hope this finds you well and not overworked from the vast amounts of email that you are putting out.

Tags: spam, humor, Domestic Goddess, blog

Better Living through Pharmaceuticals!

As a person who has dealt with, suffered through, battled, succumbed to, and been highly medicated for depression for many years, this is a tongue-in-cheek phrase that my husband and I use to describe life with said depression.

(yes, I know, you are all shocked that the Goddess, as lovely and witty as she is, has this problem. See, pharmaceuticals. I'm tellin' ya. And a bit of therapy.)

Anyway, I was listening to an audiobook today, Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart: Thirty True Things You Need to Know Now, by Gordon Livingston, and he had some very interesting thoughts on depression.

This is what he would tell his patients: "The good news is we have medications that will help with your depression. The bad news is that medication will not make you happy. Happiness isn't simply the absence of despair. It is an affirmative state in which our lives have both meaning and pleasure." People need to look at the way they are living with an eye to change.

He said that a lot of times we expect changes to occur through medications, therapy etc. but don't change the way we are living. We have the same uneventful, boring, sad existence.

We are what we do! . . . . When all is said and done, more is said than done.

He was talking about how many times we get burned or hurt by people who say they will do one thing but don't follow through, actions speak louder than words type of thing.

If we don't change our actions, we can't expect our lives to change.

He said that every person needs three things:

• something to do
• someone to love
• something to look forward to

If we don't have those things in our lives, how can we expect to get better.

This list of three things reminded me of a list that Gordon B. Hinckley* gave when talking about what every new convert to the church needs.

• A friend in the Church to whom you can constantly turn.
• An assignment. Activity is the genius of this Church.
• To be constantly "nourished by the good word of God"

It is really so true that in life we need to feel a purpose, have things to love and look forward to. I wonder if this is why I have so many hobbies and interests instead of just picking one and sticking with it.

There are so many great things in life to learn and do. I have so many ideas and interests that I would love to follow. My main problem now is lack of time to do them.

Anyway, this is something I have been thinking over today and I just wanted to share these thoughts.

*Gordon B. Hinckley is the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the Mormons.

Tags: depression, medication, therapy, happiness, Mormons, Domestic Goddess, blog

Do you really like yourself?

I just participated in Thursday Thirteen (my previous post) and the challenge was to list 13 things about yourself that you like.

I thought "that shouldn't be hard. I am up to the challenge"! So I started my list and you know what I found? It was hard. If I had been asked to list 13 things I didn't like about myself, I probably could have kept going and going. At about number seven I started thinking "hm, I wonder what other people listed" and started looking at other peoples lists for ideas.

How sad is that! I almost cheated and started listing different talents as different numbers instead of just talents but decided that was pretty lame.

Why is it so hard to find good things about ourselves, things we like about ourselves. We spend our whole lives with our own self and you would think it would be easy to know something like that.

As women, as parents, and in the other roles we take on in life, we spend our time training, building, teaching, lifting others and seem to forget to do that with ourselves.

I think the media is so prevalent that we look at the "big" people in the world and compare ourselves in ways that are really not comparable. Apples to Oranges. My Wednesday worst to your Sunday best. That kind of thing.

I am not rich or famous, my sphere of influence is fairly small in the whole scheme of things. Have we put so much emphasis and power into celebrity, fame, fortune that the ones who really make the world run, train up the children for the future, are left to feel so small and insignificant.

How do we change the perception of ourselves and of others. How do we build up ourselves while trying to build up the next generation?

Tags: Thursday Thirteen, perception, self image, Domestic Goddess, blog, musings, blogging