Sunday, October 22, 2006

To whom it may concern,

I just wanted to take a minute and thank you for the dozens of daily emails that you have been sending me, letting me know about all the many wonderful products and services that have been woefully missing from my life.

As a woman I was completely unaware that Viagra was for me and that it would make such a difference in my life. The fact that I can now get it at such a fabulous price, along with Xanax and Vallium, is wonderful. Although, I think you need to use your spell checker because you have a little problem with your spelling.

I can't wait to try out the latest hot stock tip that you have pointed me toward. Especially that I will now be making $400-$500 per week with your tips on increasing sales from my home business and will have all that extra money to invest. I guess my next step is to find a good home business to apply these new marketing tips to.

I will not be using your medications to increase my size by 100-400% as I am actually trying to lose weight, thus getting smaller. I will be more interested in your new end-all-beat-all weight loss ideas and medications. I am a little confused though, as to why you want to offer me both.

I also wanted to let you know that it is such a good idea how you put "must read" or "very important message, you need to read" in the subject line. That really gets my attention and lets me know to pay said attention to your emails. Otherwise, I might miss them.

As far as finding girls, girls, girls, I already have two teenage daughters and I don't think I really need any more females in my home right now. That is so sweet of you to think about me as an adoptive parent though.

In closing, I hope this finds you well and not overworked from the vast amounts of email that you are putting out.


12 comments:

  1. LOL OMG thats too funny!! I see you get the same e-mail I get

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  2. I get "male enhancement" spam. Ugh. Good thing they all say "SPAM" in the subject line so I don't have to actually open 'em.

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  3. you gotta wonder at the viagra market, judging from the spam I get.

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  4. How about the one that asks outright for money for his dying father? Where do these people come from?

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  5. LOLOL you're a hoot. :)

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  6. That cracked me up. I hate all that junk mail!! Jennifer

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  7. ha ha! I always get the "enlargement" emails. I'm like thanks, but I'm a WOMAN and therefore don't need that, thanks. :)

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  8. Anonymous2:06 PM

    I love your reply - so funny and witty.

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  9. LOL, this is hilarious!! ;)

    Yeah, if I'd responded to all the e-mails saying I've been left a lot of money by people in Nigeria,etc. I'd be a multibillionaire. And yeah, I get the Viagra, male enhancements, discount watches, etc.

    Lately, the subjects are nonsense words and phrases to get past the spam filter.*rolls eyes* but I delete them anyway.

    Skyangel Annie

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  10. Anonymous10:14 AM

    Thank you. If one more stranger writes to me with concern about the size of my organ (which is actually so small as to be measured in the negative numbers) I'll explode.

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  11. Anonymous11:30 AM

    I love this post! I've been getting a lot more lately than usual. Darn spammers are getting too smart about spam filters.

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  12. amen! i get all this kind of stuff too and i'm like "whaaa?" funny.

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