Passing on a Work Ethic

Oftentimes I wonder if I have been a failure as a mother or if my kids are just being kids. It has been a strange transition to go from doing everything myself and to my standards to having the kids be responsible for things and striking a balance between what I want and their abilities and/or willingness to do things.

My house used to be so much cleaner when I wasn't working full time. Now much of that responsibility falls on the kids; kids who would much rather spend time surfing the internet, playing guitar hero, sleeping, or hanging out with friends. When they do get to their chores it is doing the bare minimum to get by with having done it.

When does that desire to do things at a better or higher level kick in? Does that come with being solely responsible, having your own place and no one else to do it? Because I sure haven't found a way to instill it in my kids yet. And if I have, they sure aren't letting me in on the secret!

It makes me wonder if they are ready to be adults on their own. I wonder what kind of employees, mothers, wives they will be.

If I could go back and do anything differently while raising them it would be to let/make them do more earlier. My biggest failure with that was I either thought they were "too little to do that" or they couldn't do it to the way I (being a perfectionist) liked it done or it was easier to do it myself than to spend the time teaching them to do it "right".

The problem with this is they grow up thinking that mom will do everything and if we ask them to clean their rooms we are so mean and unfair. When my oldest was about 4 years old we told her to go and clean her room. She turned around and looked at us and said "but mom is the worker".

Wow, talk about straight to the heart!

We can joke about that comment now but the underlying message of the statement still holds true. So I want to know. How do you get that work ethic kick in? That is one torch I want to pass on.

Tags: Work Ethic, Teaching kids to work, Being a Perfectionist

School Daze.

Did you have a favorite subject in school? One you dreaded?

School and I got along fine. I was a good student, the teachers liked me, I liked most of them. I think my favorite classes were English/Reading/Literature classes. It took me a while to realize this though. When I graduated from High School my plan was to go to school for Interior Design. Now that I am older when I think of going back to school I want to study English with an art minor.

I had a lot of other classes that I enjoyed. I took French for two years. I loved my co-ed P.E. class, which says a lot for me because I am not Mrs. Sports. I had a Needle Arts class in which we did all sorts of hand-work crafty type stuff. Right up my alley.

Sometimes I have dreams that I am back in High School and I am going to my French class, but in my dream I am failing it. I am so afraid that I am not going to graduate because of it. Graduation was held in the Marriott Center because we had a class of 400+. At graduation time they used to put a big map of the seating chart up on the window of the main office. You would see everyone's names and where they were seated. If someone wasn't graduating they would have a big X through that seat. Can you imagine something like that happening today? Anyway, my seat was X'd out in this dream because I was failing French class.

I don't know where this comes from. I did pass that class and did graduate from High School. Isn't it weird how 20 some-odd years after High School I would have dreams like that.

I never have the dream where I show up at school not wearing anything though, thank heavens. Those who know and love me know that I am too much of a non-nudist. I like my jammies too much.

So, what bad dreams do you have about High School?

Tags: High School, Graduation, Bad Dreams

See why I need help!

In an effort to do better at journal writing I made a Journal Jar. It is really an old Ovaltine container covered in paper and "Mom's Journal Jar!" stamped on the front. Anyway it is full of journal prompts to get you going. Problem is, I made this thing with my girls about 7 years ago and I think I have used about three prompts from it.

See why I need help!

A few months ago for an activity in Young Women I had them make Journal Jars. I rededicated myself to journal using my blog. I am all about typing instead of pen and paper. Much faster. Have I used it? No.

See why I need help!

Well, I was talking with some friends at church (one of which mentioned I never update my blog), so when I came home from church I thought I would catch up on reading people's blogs. Lo and behold when I came to her blog, she was doing Journal Jar posts!

This has re-re-dedicated me to use my Journal Jar. Thanks Sheral!

So, to make sure I actually live up to my re-re-dedication I am actually going to post again, this time using my . . . . . you guessed it, Journal Jar!

Tags: Journal Jar

Go to bed, I'm tired!

I never understood why my mom used to say that to me when I was a kid. I always thought "well, if you are tired why don't you go to bed"?

Now that I am the mom of teenagers I completely understand the sentiment. I am tired. I want peace and quiet. When you are awake I can't have that peace and quiet. I am also afraid to leave you unsupervised with friends while I am sleeping. I am tired and want to go to bed, thus you need to go to bed.

Long story short: Go to bed, I'm tired!

It's amazing that the older we get the more we realize just how smart our parents really were.

The "eyes" have it!

I don't know what is worse, getting soap in your eye or an eyelash.

I experienced both in my shower. Here I am washing my face when my daughter, taking a shower in the other bathroom, did something that adjusted my water temperature. I was startled which caused me to briefly open my eye and get soap in it. I did my best to rinse it out and carried on with the business at hand which then led to shaving my legs. With both hands covered in foaming shave gel and holding a razor - I get an eyelash in the other eye. I switch between frantically blinking to get it out and keeping my eye closed so it doesn't hurt, all the while peering through one eye to finish shaving.

Finally finished with my shower I emerge only slightly damaged; my eyesight still in tact with only a few nicks from shaving.

So, if you see me with bloodshot eyes and a band aid on my leg; don't ask!

Are you a wordie?

I love words; love word games, crossword puzzles, plays on words, reading etc. My favorite word is superfluous.

/sʊˈpɜrfluəs/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [soo-pur-floo-uhs]
–adjective

1.	being more than is sufficient or required; excessive.

2.	unnecessary or needless.

3.	Obsolete. possessing or spending more than enough or necessary; extravagant.

I learned it in a High School English class and just loved it. It is fun to say. Come on now, say it out loud. See how it just rolls off your tongue! So much more fun to say than "you have too much".

I also love the work plethora.

/ˈplɛθərə/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [pleth-er-uh]
–noun

1.	overabundance; excess: a plethora of advice and a paucity of assistance.

What are your favorite words?

Slow down world!

I was wasting time on Facebook and clicked a link. I waited for about two seconds and thought "hm, I wonder if it didn't really click". I was on my way to click again and then saw the little hourglass and it struck me what an impatient society we have turned in to.

I remember growing up when we would call someone on the phone. We didn't have answering machines. If they were home, they would pick up; if they were on the phone, we would hear a busy signal; if they weren't home, we would call back.

I don't think my kids even know what a busy signal is.

Things that we have now are completely amazing and we get irritated that they "take so long"! The microwave - what, it takes 5 minutes? Computer - ugh, this page is taking so long to load. Cell phone - someone didn't text me back for 10 whole minutes! I actually get frustrated when I call someone and they don't have voice mail. You mean I have to call them back?

The old saying "The hurrier I go the behinder I get" rings more and more true. Doesn't it feel like that some times? We rush and hurry, fit more into our days, do more at work with computers but work longer hours and spend less time at home with our families. We order take out because it is faster and wonder why our waistlines grow and our wallets shrink.

When did the world start spinning faster?